My time as a Christian was brief enough that I really cannot asscoiate the Jesus of my childhood with Institutional Christianity. Awakening to my Pagan identity was far easier than it was for many of my friends, who had grown up Southern Baptist, because I was able to distiniguish between the Mystery I encountered and the values that I could embrace (forgiveness, kindness, gentleness) and those I could not (homophobia, anti-intellectualism, misogyny). In studying religion, mythology,and art history, and through my own personal questing for an approach to the Divine that did not require I leave more than half of myself hidden, I came to see Jesus Christ and the Christain myth as another iteration of a powerful narrative trope which is recurrent in the Western mythopoetic tradition. The Slain God, the resolution of opposites, the New Aeon--it is a deep well of archetypal power.
I too had to detach completely from participating in this myth and its ritual cycle (okay, excepct for Xmas). In later years, I tried to reframe the mythos through an ironic or pop culture context, celebrating Dead Rock Star Day on Easter. It was certainly ironic when my Pagan path took a sharp swerve away from Celtic Studies and Wicca, towards Santeria, hoodoo and Southern conjure. Although the Orisas are African spirits, being surrounded by the images and prayers of Saints, of Christ and the Blessed Virgin, makes one feel less concerned about defining what the Mystery than establishing a relationship with it.
Although I honor the Christian myth as an important narrative I cannot call myself Christian or integrate Jesus into my practice because I have only felt His presence in my life throuh the music and art this myth has inspired. At one time I actively courted this contact. (This is not my experience with the Blessed Virgin, who has been always with me). Even if I sought a deeper connection to this energetic current, its association with so many values that I can't embrace, would make it impossible for me to claim the word.