“Go at your own pace”

Posted on October 28, 2008
Filed Under elemental work, emptiness, mystical journeys, Taylor Ellwood | Leave a Comment

When I hiked on Tuesday and later on Sunday, each time I hiked XAH was with me, loping alongside me. Everytime I felt the urge to speed up, he cautioned me, “Go at your own pace.” I slowed down. I started to lope along at a pace that was easy on my body. The hike became much easier and I started to notice more details. Instead of trying to conquer the mountain, I was soaking in what was around me. I started to have a deeper appreciation for the way the light was filtered through the trees. The cold air kissed me as it never had before, and the Earth seemed to welcome as it’s child. XAH grinned at me and said, “See, much easier. You’re so busy trying to get somewhere you forget how to enjoy where you are.” Relaxing into my own pace, I focused less on where I wanted to…I’m already where I need to be.

When I think about that advice in my life, I appreciate anew something I’ve thought before: It will all be there tomorrow…Do what I can today, but relax and enjoy what I have as well. “Go at your own pace” means so much more than regulating my pace and in emptiness going at your own pace is what keeps you going on the road to everything and nothing

A sharp wrenching pain
the feeling of claws scrabbling against my skin
A muzzle coming forth from my chest
blood dripping from the lolling tongue
the golden eyes ablaze with life
as the light from my own eyes begins to fade
under a film of death.

He is reborn, he is reborn
I am just the capsule for his expression
Nine tails come out of the gap
He’s standing over my ruined body
He grins down at my with gaping jaws,
and then playfully seizes my face in his haws
Delicately, delicately
he could crush my face so easily, but he just swipes me with his tongue.

“Join me…”
He swipes his tongue over my wounds
the blood clots, the vessels repair, the skin closes.
I stand up, with his help,
my hand on his fur

“Destruction is birth
Creativity is death
Everything in nothing
nothing becoming everything
Join me”

We run, run, run into the void
I am distant from everything
and yet so close
you could feel the fox-fire
of my breath on your cheek
if you knew how.

His eyes are infinity
his breath is death
I’m fading into him

So this is nothing
I’m so empty
I’m just a husk
everything is gone
and yet it’s all so close.

“Join me…”