Are you the magic you work? Are you the experiences you have? Are you the clothes you wear or the car you drive? Before I go all Tyler Durden on you here, the reason I’m asking these questions is because of something I read in the book Creating (Affiliate link), where he discussed the necessity of being able to separate yourself from your work, relationships, experiences, etc. It really struck me, because there is something to be said for overly identifying with something.
In magical work this over identification is framed as a lust for results, but it could also be framed as an obsessive fixation on something. You hold on too tight to an identity and the result is that you don’t actually get what you want, because you’re too caught up in the identity instead of knowing when to separate yourself out from it. You let it define you, instead of seeing it for what is. the only way to free yourself from fixation is to recognize it for what it is and separate yourself from it.
This separation can be a challenge. Certainly I can attest to the challenges I’ve faced at times with being too focused on something, overly identifying with it to the point that it has created more problems than solutions. When you become too focused on a result, too fixated on a experience, you have to recognize that it is creating a distraction and that you need to find a way to put some distance between yourself and what you’ve overly identified with.
This is where the principle of separation can come into play. First examine whatever it is you are overly identifying with. What is at the core of that obsession? What is driving to cling so tight to something? Ask yourself what would happen if you lost what you are overly identifying with? Consider as well as that perhaps you don’t really have it anyway, and that what you are holding on to is really just an illusion. It’s the illusion you’ve created to give yourself a false sense of comfort.
Another way we can look at this is that an obsession is a blockage. It’s ice, frozen and restrictive, freezing you into place. How do you deal with the ice? You dissolve it. Touch the tip of your tongue to the roof of your mouth. Take a deep breath in through your nose, and then exhale out. As you breathe in draw your chi to the top of your head and then release it down your body, flowing around whatever blockages exist, turning it from ice to water and then continuing to dissolve until it either goes outward as gas or inward as emptiness.
Yet another way is to remove yourself from the environment where the obsession plays itself out. Go do something different because by placing yourself in a different environment you separate yourself from that identity and experience and you can place them into the right perspective. One thing I like to do is go dashing, where I’m delivering food, but also getting some time away from my usual environment so I can process whatever I’m overly identifying with and get separation from it. Distracting yourself in one form or another can liberate you from whatever you are holding on it because it takes you out of the environment you are in and gives you space to just breathe and be, separate from everything you are typically immersed in.
Cultivating separation as a principle in your life helps you recognize when you need to let go. It’s something I’m working on right now, because its an area I can improve on. Getting the right perspective and recognizing you aren’t a given identity, experience or result can sometimes be the most liberating decision you make for yourself.
