I discuss the relationship between inner work and result. When we do inner work it helps us get better results because we know ourselves and we are living a life by design and by specific values. Inner work helps us figure out who we are and what we want and how to manifest it.
What makes a spirit a spirit?
I've been thinking about the question, "What makes a spirit, a spirit?"
I'm currently writing Walking with Nature Spirits, and in the writing of this book I've been thinking about this question because of how I approach the work with nature spirits, but also because of the stereotypical imagery associated with nature spirits, which usually has them set up with imagery of gnomes, undines, slyphs, etc., basically humancentric shapes and appearances.
The benefit of the humancentric shapes is that it makes easy for us to identify with those spirits. The downside however is that we all too often get stuck filtering our experience of a given spirit on the basis of the human oriented shape we associate with it. This isn't limited to nature or elemental spirits either.
We see this same tendency to humanize the appearance and experience of spirits with Daemonic spirits, angelic spirits, and any other type of spirit out there. This tendency brings with it a kind of entitlement as well: Namely the entitlement that the spirits are really here to serve or work for us. It's a naïve belief that isn't fully accurate and can create potential problems when we adhere too strongly to notions of what we think spirits are or are not.
One of my main purposes for writing the Walking with Spirits series is to present an alternate perspective to spirit work that is rooted in building a collaborative relationship with the spirits, but also recognizes that to experience the spirits we must be willing to experience them on their terms as much as possible.
What does that look like?
When I work with a spirit what I try to do is engage the spirit on the level of experience that it chooses to show up at. What that means is that instead of expecting it to show up a specific way or in a specific form, I open myself to the experience of the spirit as it chooses to show up.
Sometimes that still includes a human form and human communication, but sometimes the experience is more direct, the feeling of sensations as the spirit makes itself known sensually. For example, I might be walking down a path and feel the spirit show up and connect with me emotionally or through physical sensations. I might experience a transmission of information.
We've gotten so used to spirits showing up in ways that are easily understandable to us, but I'm interested in what gets lost in the translation as it were, because I think that some of what a spirit could share does get lost in translation.
This brings me back to that question of what makes a spirit a spirit?
Is a spirit defined by the categories and taxonomies that we put it in or by the shapes it takes on and becomes for our benefit? Or is the spirit something we can't quite define because it doesn't fit our conventional human experience?
I don't have an answer to these questions...just observations and experiences that help me connect with the spirits, but also help me realize how filtered and biased that connection can be. I recognize that even with the approach I've taken which is a much more sensorial approach I can't necessarily remove all the bias and filter that comes with the human experience. I can be aware of it, but it is still a part of me, a part of the reality of my life, and perhaps it is something that the spirits find value in.
I wonder if they ask a similar question...what makes a human, a human?
Releasing Old Identities: How changes in appearance inform reality
picture copyright Taylor Ellwood 2023
For the first time in over 30 years, I cut my hair short. I've had long hair since I was a pre-teen but I recently decided that I wanted to make a change. I felt like it was time to cut my hair and in the process shed old identities in favor of new ones. For me, getting a hair was a magical act of identity transformation. I had long hair for so long and in a very real sense it was an established part of my identity as a person and even as a magician.
Yet identity is fluid and malleable. What seems fixed can be changed. A lot of times what makes your identity seem fixed has more to do with your perspective and attachment to that identity than to the actual physical reality of it. I kept my hair long because I was attached to how I looked, and how I felt about having long hair.
The act of getting my hair cut may not seem overly magical, but for me it was the choice to let of attachment to appearance, to looking a specific way. It was the choice to let go of not just the physical appearance of long hair, but also all the attachments I had to that appearance and just as importantly it was an act of letting go of the weight of that hair, physically, but also metaphysically.
Lessons I learned in 2022
I reflect on the lessons I learned in 2022 and share my vision for what I plan to manifest in 2023. I also discuss the false intimacy of social media and share why I’m making some changes in what I share on here and on social media in general.
How to flip the script in any situation
What role do we play in our lives? We don’t necessarily have control of everything or everyone around us, but what we do have is control over the role we play. I share a technique I’ve been using in the last couple months that has helped me change my perception about the role I am in and allowed me to flip the script on the situations I’m in.
How to release your neediness and discover your actual needs
In the last few months I have had a great opportunity present itself to me. I have come face to face with my neediness and co-dependent behavior and I’m going through this process to recognize and release the neediness in order to discover what I truly need. That probably sounds a little contradictory until you consider that the root issue of neediness is based in fear. When we feel needy, we often feel that way because we are afraid to discover ourselves and what we truly need.
This journey of mine has involved me learning even more about my relationship with fear. I already knew a lot about it, but I’ve come to recognize how fear is the root of neediness. When I feel needy or clingy, what is operating at the root of that needy clinginess is the fear I feel. Part of what has helped in doing this work is connecting with Saturn, because in a very real sense Saturn is an embodiment of fear.
Manifestation is the realization of the imaginal
When we manifest the imagination into reality we turn the seed of potential into a new identity for ourselves and reality. I explain what this means and why it can change your approach to magic when you approach manifestation from your identity instead of from your scarcity.
Sign up for From Imagination to Manifestation:
The role of separation in magical work
Are you the magic you work? Are you the experiences you have? Are you the clothes you wear or the car you drive? Before I go all Tyler Durden on you here, the reason I’m asking these questions is because of something I read in the book Creating (Affiliate link), where he discussed the necessity of being able to separate yourself from your work, relationships, experiences, etc. It really struck me, because there is something to be said for overly identifying with something.
In magical work this over identification is framed as a lust for results, but it could also be framed as an obsessive fixation on something. You hold on too tight to an identity and the result is that you don’t actually get what you want, because you’re too caught up in the identity instead of knowing when to separate yourself out from it. You let it define you, instead of seeing it for what is. the only way to free yourself from fixation is to recognize it for what it is and separate yourself from it.
Identity as the compilation of the past
In the last week and a half I’ve been engaged in an experiment around how I frame my past, in relationship to my present. This experiment came about as a result of reading The Courage to be Happy (affiliate link) In that book the author makes the point that people often use the past to define the present, justifying their current circumstances because of what previously happened. Certainly, this has been my own experience and I found myself in a place where I was feeling on edge because of events that had happened over the course of the last year.
The author makes the point that an alternate perspective can be adapted, where we consider what meaning a person’s present identity is giving to the past. He also argues that the past doesn’t exist, because its something that can’t be regained It is simply gone. Instead what happens is that people compile their past experiences and use them to justify their current sense of identity. Anything that runs counter to the present experience they want to cultivate is conveniently forgotten and ignored. Consequently what ought to be considered is that a person’s now defines their past as opposed to the past defining the present.
The Ontological Reality of Deities, Spirits, and otherworld beings
Thanks to the polytheism vs pop culture magic debate that has been going on I've been thinking a lot about my own interactions with deities, demons, spirits, etc. Galina Krassakova posts her own views about her experiences and why she doesn't need theories to define her relationships with her deities on Pagan Square and though it might surprise her and the other polythiests, I'm actually in agreement with her argument that theory ultimately distracts from doing the actual work. Theories are at best tools, but even as tools they should be used carefully lest they overshadow the actual work. My latest article on Pagansquare discusses theory and its role in magic further, but for this post I thought I'd focus on my experiences with Deity, spirits, and other assorted spiritual beings I've worked with. That phrase "work with" is likely where I and the polytheists differ and we'll get to why that is later.
My journey with the spirits has taken me on some interesting paths, and some of those paths have been theory oriented. I've explored archetypal theory for example and applied it to my practice. My book Pop Culture Magick is a prime example of the application of archetypes to magical work and to be honest I still use some of that in my practice, particularly with identity magic. And working with the concepts of archetypes has lead me to some interesting conclusions about deities, demons, etc., based less on theory and moreso on observation, practice, and experience with said beings. I don't feel that these realizations take away from the reality of the spirits, so much as provide some additional forms of engagement that ultimately can lead to a more primal experience of spirit. I liken it removing a mask and uncovering what's really underneath the mask, and realizing that the mask was used in order to provide a particular space where spirit and human could meet for the comfort of the human.
Yet the removal of the mask was also the removal of theory. Instead of focusing on the attributes and behaviors, the trappings as it were, I encountered the deeper ontological reality of the spiritual beings I was and do connect with. And instead of trying to get them to fit my agenda or needs, I allowed and do allow myself to be moved by them, to fully experience them as they are instead of through an interpretation based on theory. The irony is, that by allowing myself to be so moved, I've been moved as well by the pop culture spirits I've worked with, the ones that are supposedly not real. In my article on pop culture on pagan square I mentioned how I had a long relationship with Thiede. Thiede is a character in Storm Constantine's Wraeththu series, a fantasy series, and yet for me Thiede has been and is real. Thiede is the guardian of Space, the revealer of the ley lines between planets and stars, a dehara, and so much more to me. Reading about him in a book was only the start of my connection to him, and it was a connection, from the start, that moved me deeply.
When I say the phrase "move me" I'm not talking about being emotionally moved to tears. I'm talking about encountering a spiritual force that has deeply affected me, changed me and pointed my life and spiritual practice in a different direction than it might have gone otherwise. And that experience isn't something you can just slap a theory on. It defies theory because theory is ultimately an intellectual process used to categorize and define something into a neat little box that you can store away until you need it. I've had an encounter with something fundamentally different from me and that experience has changed who I am. It has changed my identity.
And this is not an isolated incident. Each year I work with a different elemental force and part of that process involves working with a spirit guide that provides a "face" through which I can interact with that elemental force. The elemental balancing work is an intense process of change that is brought by interacting with the element. There is no theory for it, but simply the engagement of practice and the recognition that I need to work with a given elemental force in my life. The various entities I've worked with during the balancing rituals haven't been archetypes...far from it. They are collection of beings that even today are in my life. They are not something I believe in...they are something I experience. That's an important distinction to make because in my opinion belief is just another theory, another tool. The experience of them in my life is something else. To me, the spirits I work with, traditional or pop culture, are real. There is an ontological essence of being, of identity that is objective, beyond any categorization I could give it, and it is sustained not merely by my own experience, but also by the experiences of others, independent of my own.
My work with my spirits has some form of devotion and offering attached to it. Some of the tattoos on my body, for example, are devotional offerings of my skin made to a particular element as a way of recognizing the significant role the element has played in my life. I also make offerings to particular spirits in the form of writing or through painting. But the work I do with them is nonetheless geared more toward the advancement of my work with magic than anything else. They play an important role in my life, but they are not central to it, so much as they help me focus on what is central. Thus I work with them, and this likely is different from how the polytheists approach such matters.
Just because some of my spirits aren't tied to a particular religion or culture of old doesn't invalidate their existence. And while it might be said that such spirits were created by an author or artist, I'd argue that perhaps they weren't created, so much as channeled and experienced. Whether anyone agrees with me or not on that issue isn't important. What's important in the end is that I am doing the work I am called to do. I'm getting out of my own way and letting it happen, letting myself be moved and inspired, so that I can do what I need to do. And really, isn't that the point?
Month 10 Fire Elemental Balancing Ritual
8-11-12 I haven't written in this post for half a month, not because things weren't happening but because life has been so busy. Part of it's been the catch up on work after you are done with a vacation and part of it has also been coming to the final part of a writing project I've been working on and thus focusing more on it than anything else. Whenever I get close to finishing a writing project it becomes the center of my reality. So let's see...
I've just started reading another book on relationships with my wife. It's one I'd read before, but at that time I was the only one to read it. Reading it with someone else adds a dimension to the experience because of the discussions K and I are having about the book and what the author's take on relationships means to both of us. I think that with this relationship I am discovering what love can really be, not just in terms of loving another but also myself. I can honestly say that I never felt as content or happy in my life as I've felt the last couple of years. We've had our bumps along the way, but we've been able to work through them with a level of openness and honesty that I was unable to give or receive previously.
The fire work has been interesting more in terms of the direction its pointing me to: Eros aka movement. I'll get into that more at some point, but right now its in an exploratory stage. Fire in and of itself has really been about (this month and every month) coming to peace with my passions and desires and recognizing how much they've been driven by a feeling of emptiness and restlessness, which in doing this work and the relationship work has actually become much less prevalent. I still feel restless occasionally, but I am able to identify it and work with it in a way that had eluded me in the past.
8-12-12 When I think about my place in the Pagan-Occult community, I tend to think of myself as someone on the outskirts of said community. I feel that way in just about any community, and I recognize that a lot of it is my own choice, but it also born as much from a disassociation with people in general. At times I feel like I'm an observer who is studying everything around me. What offerings I bring are genuine, but they come from the outside, offering with the unusual perspective that can only come when you choose to go away from the norm and tried and true to discover whatever else is out there.
Even as a writer and publisher I'm on the outside. I've chosen to publish my books with a small publisher that does print on demand books. While my books are carried in independent stores, you'll likely never see them on the walls of a Barnes and Noble or Powells books simply because retailers don't like it when they can't return books that don't sell. I could probably get published by Llewellyn or another publisher at this point, but I doubt I'd have the level of control over the text or cover art that I have and generally what I've seen from the majority of publishers doesn't inspire a level of confidence in me that the work will be respected in the way it needs to be.
And that's the benefit of being on the outside...very few people care if you fit in if you already don't fit in. And not fitting in allows you some liberties you might not discover otherwise. And sometimes you even discover, as I have, that there are more people into your work then you thought there were and more people who appreciate the perspective because they see the value it brings.
8-15-12 There are days when I wake up and do not like the person I see in the mirror. Fortunately they are few and far between, but on those days I am reminded of my burdens, of my remorse, of the mistakes I've made. There are some things you never forget because you know you need to remember them as a reminder of who you don't want to be. And then too there's that feeling of wanting to find something to distract you from what you are feeling, which is absolutely the worst choice to make. You may not like what you feel, but being present with it, working through it is far better then trying to distract yourself. That's something I've had to learn the hard way, and its still something I'm learning. I'm better at this realization than I was a few years ago, but its still a struggle on a day like today. The urge to run away or lose myself or whatever else because I don't want to feel what I'm feeling is sharp, yet instead of doing all that, I chose to feel it, chose to feel my unhappiness with myself, chose to feel the pain I am feeling. I chose to be present and move in that presence through meditation and mediation of what I'm feeling. I don't know that this makes me a better person so much as it makes me someone who is choosing to be aware of his moments of weakness and vulnerability.
And there is also this other current that has recently come to my attention around movement via Eros. I need to do some movement rituals for areas of my life that I feel stuck in right now. Change happens through movement, but intentional movement is better then just any movement. The point isn't to run away. The point is to move toward a solution.
8-17-12 When you live with fear each day you must learn to face it, or otherwise let it control you. Whether its fear of change, the unknown or something else, you either learn to master it, or it masters you. When it masters you, it stops you from acting, and when you master it, you use it to motivate your actions.
8-21-12 As one cycle begins to wind down another cycle begins to wind up. Still its important to focus on the moment at hand, and appreciate what is happening now. Too many people are focused on getting to the next moment, and thus they miss out on what is happening around them right now. I used to be that way, myself, and now find myself savoring each moment I have far more than I used to. My tomorrows are not infinite and what I have to experience is what is present right now. Maintaining presence is being in the present as it presents itself to you and through you.
The relationship between magic and being
When I think about magic and identity, I think about embodiment and being. In particular with the word being, I think of it as a verb that denotes a person's life as as a process of presence entering into collaboration with reality. The presence of a person contains all the potential of the person, as well as access to possibilities of what the person can become. Magic, when employed, is a melding of the identity of the person (his/her being) with the situation. It is presence joining reality, merging possibility with what already is to create something which nonetheless contains the presence/being of the magician.
When we no longer divorce our actions from our state of being what we find is a different awareness of possibility and magic. No longer is a problem looked at as something external and separate, but instead there is an acknowledgement of the connection between the magician and the problem. The magician examines not merely the problem as it shows up in the world around him/her, but also the problem as it shows up in him/herself, to understand the connection it has to his/her life, and also to understand how to solve it, not merely in the environment around him/her, but also within.
When being is a verb there is a recognition that ontology is not some static image of identity, but an active presence of identity that challenges the magician to know him/herself as a fluid reality that mixes with possibility on a regular basis. We are all gates to possibility, and thus our state of being is one of change. Identity, when perceived this way, is not about attachments but about becoming and unbecoming all at once. Magic is a process of identity, part of the becoming and unbecoming, simultaneously binding us to possibilities while undoing connections to others. Reality itself is no longer perceived as static, so much as it is a canvas to be painted on. What seems real falls away as possibilities are embodied in everyday life. What becomes real is a melding of presence and reality and as such it can become unreal under the right circumstances.
Magical practice based on an ontological approach frees the magician from a doing and having perspective which tends to cause the magician to objectify reality and even him/herself. To have something is to own it and possess it, and yet it also possesses you. To do something is to act on it and yet try and separate yourself from it, ignoring that it has its own influence on you. Such perspectives limit the magician and dull the mind. The ontological approach acknowledges that everything is connected and that what is acted on, also acts on the magician. There is no objectification of reality, but instead a profound realization of connection and understanding that any situation encountered by the magician has a connection that goes deeper than what casual observation displays. And when the magician can make changes to his/her presence, the core of his/her own reality, s/he also makes changes to reality around him/her, changing the ontological state of not only him/herself but also reality as s/he interacts and understands it.
Magical Identity Pre-orders
Magical Identity explores magic from an ontological perspective, to show why identity is an essential part of your magical practice. In this book, author Taylor Ellwood explores how you can change your identity and why making changes to your identity is the most effective magical practice you'll ever learn. In this book you will discover:
- Advanced neuro-magic techniques for working with your body consciousness and neurotransmitter entities.
- The web of Time and Space, a space/time magic technique for changing your life.
- The key to successfully changing bad habits into positive habits.
- and much more!
Magical Identity challenges you to take your magical practice to the next level. You will learn techniques that will change how you think of magic and yourself and will show you how to create effective change for your life.
Here's what other authors are saying about Magical Identity!
Like Space/Time Magic and other of his works before it, Taylor Ellwood has filled Magical Identity with a potent combination of magical techniques for change, the neurological discoveries that explain how these techniques work, and accounts of how he has applied them in his own life. -- Bill Whitcomb, Author of the Magician's Companion
Throughout this book you'll find a sparkling clarity in the writing (seriously; no mystic mumbo jumbo, no obscure oh-so-spookyness). And when you've read this book the chances are that you'll have discovered an attitude to magic that is rich in new ideas and perspectives and will undoubtedly enhance your own approach, whatever your style or tradition. -- Julian Vayne, Author of Magick Works and Now That's What I Call Chaos Magick
Learning the answer to the question “Who am I?” may prove vitally important, at some stage of the game, for most magicians. Allow Taylor Ellwood to be your guide; his answers aren’t simple ones, rather, he describes a method for exploring the interconnectedness of human and universe in a way that promises to help you find your own answers. -- Phil Farber, author of Brain Magick
This book is now available for pre-orders. The book will be available in March 2012. The cost is $20.99, plus Shipping and Handling.
International orders
Domestic orders
Books will also be available on Amazon, Immanion Press and in your local Occult bookstore
Multiversal Tone
The hypnotic movement of the music,the sashay that calls for a steady shuffle as you and I move in time we create this altered reality a place of eyes, your eyes staring into mine mine staring into yours Your soul baring its truth to me showing all your possible timelines realities unfolding as you say, "Here I am in all my multiversal glory." You are everything and nothing Your eyes are eight arrowed stars that portray entropy The music swirls, stings, rattles its not just a sound its an experience shaking the very boundaries of the bodies engaged in this dance of robotic, synchronized movements back and forth, back and forth all is bliss, all is bliss Reveal yourself to me and I'll show you a new reality in my own eyes as I unveil my secret self displaying the glories of my true nature the celestial nature of my tone I bring to the universe perfect sound joining other perfect sounds we create this harmony gears in clocks, the ticking of time the movement of space Here we are you and I.
Fear and Magic
I read a post where the writer argued that if you weren't feeling fear in your magical practice, you either aren't human, or you are trying hard to stay in your safety zone. I get the point of this post, and to some degree I agree with it. Feeling some fear as you break your boundaries and challenge your identity is a good thing. It means you're doing the hard work. Challenging yourself to move forward when you feel fear is a necessary part of life in general. When I practice magic though, I don't feel fear. I feel empowerment. I feel excited, alive, vibrant. Magic is life, magic is power, magic is turning the impossible into reality. When I feel fear, I feel it in the moments when I do internal work, and I face within myself those weaknesses and issues and hurts and pains. That's when I feel fear. That's why I do my internal work...to reach a place of understanding and resolution with those fears so that when I practice my magical work, there is resolve and knowing that what I do aligns to my identity.
We all approach magical work differently. When I work with the elementals and spirits I approach them as friends, as companions. Other people do not. I think how you approach such beings sets the tone for the type of interaction you'll have with them. Thus to approach them as friends, to approach them with confidence is my own way of knowing them. It works because it's something I feel confident in. It works because I know my place in relationship to their own.
Fear is a funny emotion. It can paralyze a person, motivate a person...it can block and push. I find that knowing where to encounter fear changes your magical practice. Encountering it in my internal work and making it an active part of that work has changed the external work and the need to do the external work, and changed my life...its much quieter now than it was before.
A new Year, A new you
I saw this blog entry on Twitter and was intrigued by what the person had to say about reinventing herself. It reminds me a bit of the elemental balancing ritual I do each year. I'm in the 2nd month of my new year, and in a sense the new person I'm discovering as I work with the element of fire. But it also made me think about the fact that I'm in the process of reinventing two of my businesses. I'm reinventing Magical Experiments, slowly but surely, both in terms of offering correspondence courses (I'm working on the magical process course currently) and in terms of branding. But with Imagine Your Reality, I'm reinventing the entire business. I've just gotten the social media piece nailed down, and I'm finally turning toward the business coaching part and redoing my entire business plan. It's a reinvention of identity, both for myself, but also for people I want to market my services too. It's an ongoing challenge, because I'm not just writing a new business plan, I'm also doing a fair amount of internal work. For example at our class, we were challenged to rewrite our internal stories into more positive ones. What does it have to do with business? Quite a lot actually, because the internal reality you believe is the reality that manifests in your life.
Each year, the elemental balancing ritual is part of my reinvention. The thematic approach provides enough structure to make consistent changes, while providing enough freedom to allow yourself to experience the lessons needed to make those changes happen. A necessary part of that process involves keeping a journal of sorts, which is why I blog on this journal about the experiences each month. The only exception has been a two year gap, wherein I focused on Magical Identity. You won't necessarily find such personal entries in it, but it nonetheless encapsulates the experiences of two years of reinvention.
Change is a constant. Embracing change within your magical practice is how you take control of the change you experience and make it part of your identity.
Researching the brain
Although I've already written the first draft of my new book, I'm still continuing to do research on the neuroscience of the brain (one of the books I've recently read is reviewed below). It's a fascinating subject for me, even without writing a book, but writing a book does shape a lot of the reading and experimentation I'm doing. What interests me the most is how much a person's sense of self is wrapped up in the brain and how easily that can be changed by an accident, stroke etc. It demonstrates just how fragile a personality is...its based on biological realities as much as on any metaphysical sense we attribute to it. A lot of my work with the brain has involved being able to go in and interact with the neuro-chemistry in order to effect desired changes in personality. For example, no longer having to suffer a mental disease such as depression involves making changes to the biological aspects of depression. Some people accomplish this through drugs...my preference has been targeted meditation work with neurotransmitters.
The brain is adaptive enough when it comes to doing such work, because it naturally has the capability to change, thanks to neuro-plasticity. Nonetheless making such changes has to be done carefully and one of the reasons I've read up so much on neuroscience, is to understand the mechanisms of change that are already incorporated in the brain. Even knowing that information, I think its important to carefully experiment with desired changes you want to bring to your brain.
It's also important to recognize that what we know about the brain is still not entirely accurate. Not so long ago, there was a belief that the functions of the brain could be mapped to specific parts...while there's some truth to that, there's also a lot of truth that functions don't solely belong to a specific area, but are shared in part by the neural network and specifically how it shares information across the network. Experimentation needs to be done cautiously, with a recognition that in someways all we have is an idea of how the brain works. We can test that idea...we can experiment with it, but we also need to acknowledge its limitations and recognize that experimentation will take us off the charted edge to the unknown space, with all of its mysteries.
Experimentation should challenge us to go into the unknown, while research grounds us in information we can use to push ourselves toward that unknown space. What we bring back from the unknown space is more information, to provide further grounding and a better sense of what we can do with what we have. I recognize my magical work with my brain will likely never be perceived as scientific or as valid as what actual neuroscientists do in their studies, yet I also know it has brought desirable changes into my life, improving the quality of my circumstances, and that others who have followed my work have also benefited. That's the real test for the magician...not if something fits acceptable scientific paradigms and knowledge, but rather if you can take it, obtain a result, and then share it and help others achieve similar results. Sometimes magicians forget that in their fervor to "scientifically" fit-in with the dominant paradigms of acceptable thought. To them and all others I urge: Take what you can from the system, but don't restrict yourself to what others have told you...try it out yourself, test through your own experience and let that be your record and great work.
Book Review: The Tell-Tale Brain (Affiliate Link) by V. S. Ramachandran
In this book, the author explains what mirror neurons are and presents a variety of case studies on them as well as discussing various neurological diseases and what causes those diseases. He also discusses the connection between linguistics, art, and neuroscience. This book is fascinating and the author presents compelling cases. More importantly, he helps the reader understand some of the science in neuroscience with stories and examples that provide context to the science he is explaining Overall a really good book on a fascinating topic.
Why its not a good idea to destroy part of yourself
The other day I decided to do a meditation technique to work with a part of myself that I thought I wanted to change. I did the meditation technique and basically I ended up poking a part of myself that didn't care for what I was doing and responded with quite a reaction, which showed up both internally and also in my life around me. Fortunately, I was able to sort matters out in my life, but I realized that what I'd tried to do, which essentially was to get rid of a part of myself, wasn't really a good idea. At times, in our lives, there can be a temptation to try and get rid of part of yourself or change it or try to fit it some standard of behavior that doesn't really apply to it. Inevitably, what ends up happening is that the part you try to change defends itself quite vigorously and you realize that it wasn't such a good idea.
This isn't to say you can't change behavior. You certainly can, but trying to do a radical change is never advised, and doesn't make you happy. Instead such changes need to occur gradually, being worked through, and even when such changes are made, they usually focus on behavior, as opposed to identity, which is essentially how you define yourself. You can change behavior, but changing identity can be a lot harder and you genuinely have to no longer want to identify yourself in a particular way to make the change successful. This means you need to work with the values and beliefs that represent that part of your identity and determine if they no longer relevant to your life.
My main point is this: Don't try and get rid of part of yourself for anyone or anything. Better to do the internal work and determine how it really fits into your life. Accepting who you is the greatest liberation you can give yourself.
Book and Video Review: The Lost Secret of Immortality (Affiliate Link) by Barclay Powers
The video is well done and presents a lot of ideas on internal alchemy as its done in both the the East and West. I'd particularly recommend it to anyone just starting out as it has a wealth of information, but even more seasoned practitioners will find it useful. The book serves as a useful complement to the video, providing further information on concepts discussed in the video. I'd have liked to have seen some exercises included in the book, but the author does a good job of pointing to additional sources. Overall a a useful resource guide.
My inspiration for my magical systems
I was recently asked where I got my inspiration for the Sigil web technique in Space/Time Magic. But the person who asked also noted that he felt my work was writing was far enough away from the sources I cited that he was curious in general. It's a good question to ask. Where do I get my ideas for my magical work? If you look at the bibliography of any of my books, you'll probably note that one third to one half of the titles cited have nothing to do with magic. Or rather, they only have something to do with magic, because I saw something in the material that I knew I could apply magic to. The rest of the sources are books on magic...some traditional, some less so, all interesting to me, only so much in how I can take the content and experiment with it, in order to adapt it to my needs and circumstances. That's really how I approach anything I read: "What's in this book that is insightful and useful and how can I take it and experiment with it, both for my own needs, and also for curiosity's sake?" But that's just the surface. I'm an insatiable reader. I'm usually working on about six books at a given time, and all of it is very interesting, but that's only part of my inspiration.
I'm really motivated by curiosity more than anything else. I'm insatiably curious. I want to know what I can do...I want to test my limits, and I want to know how I can take all of my interests and apply them to magic. There's no tradition for me, no specific way of doing things. I get that for some people, a lot of people, that works...but not me. I want to know and explore and try things out. I want to be on the edge.
I'm inspired by resistance as well. Every person who's told me, "You can't do that", or "It's reinventing the wheel" has inspired me. I can't thank enough those people.
And I'm creative. I've always looked at the world differently. I see how things fit together and I run with it and play with it, and experiment...and so on.
My inspiration for how I approach magic, how I approach everything I do comes down to this: "It's always better to play by your own rules than someone elses" That's why I do magic the way I do it...because anyone else's rules for doing magic only interest me insofar as I can take it apart and put it back into something that fits my style, life, and needs.
Of Wounds and Tattoos
In a previous post, I showed off my most recent tattoo. Since showing it off, I've had an interesting, if somewhat painful experience that I want to relate. A couple days after I'd gotten the tattoo, I had three sores appear around the tattoo. One sore was actually in the tattoo, but on a spot that hadn't been inked. Another appeared in a straight line below it, and another appeared at an angle, where you essentially had a triangle. Without getting into too much TMI, the sores ended up infected, with one becoming an abscess. The timing of this was interesting. Kat, my wife, thinks that my body was responding to the tattoo and releasing toxicity. Given that I'd gotten all the work done in a 3 week period, I can believe that, but at the same time I can't help but wonder if it was also a demonstration of what the tattoo represents: Balance in Identity. Achieving balance means facing and releasing toxicity in your life. It means recognizing where you've allowed yourself to be held up by your own issues.
In meditating on the wounds that appeared, I realized that they represented the work I'd done and continue to do with my elemental balancing ritual. I've worked through a lot of internal toxicity and cleaned it out of my life. It's been painful, but it's also freed me of so much of what I was holding in. Those physical embodiments of the toxicity reminded me of all that work. They're also a reminder that such work can be ongoing.
In other news...
Recently Immanion Press released its latest Anthology: Shades of Faith. You can order the book via this website or via Amazon. Here's a brief description of what it's about:
Shades of Faith: Minority Voices in Paganism is an anthology that encompasses the voices and experiences of minorities within the Pagan community and addresses some of the challenges, stereotyping, frustrations, talents, history and beauties of being different within the racial constructs of typical Pagan or Wiccan groups.