Picture copyright Taylor Ellwood 2019 - Auriel
8-24-2019 - I switched over to Venus/Netzach/Auriel the other day and its been interesting to note the energetic shift. I feel a bit more laid back and contemplative since shifting over, but I also still feel driven to write. In one sense, I am experiencing creativity in different phases and the Venus phase is distinct because it doesn’t feel as fast as Mercury, but it does feel a bit more grounded.
With the release of my first fiction book, I think its taken on the form of contemplating why I love what I’m doing, as well as what I’m willing to do to pursue that love. It seems appropriate to Auriel that I’m doing this because I’m starting my fiction writing career and it will take some work that I haven’t had to do in a long time as a non-fic writer.
8-26-2019 Venus is having me slow down a bit, make time to think, to be present with myself and to soak in what I learned last month. Yesterday I started to write and realized what I really wanted to do was sit on my porch swing and just think for a while, so I sat on the porch swing and just let my thoughts go and consider what the future ought to be. It was illustrative and helpful because it made me realize again that my love of writing is cultivated in part by taking breaks and letting myself just be.
8-29-2019 I’m finding the Venus/Netzach/Auriel is helping me pace myself and balancing our the Mercury energy from last month. Really, they balance each other, and as a result I find that the writing is still prolific, but even more focused than before. It’s no surprise to me that I’m developing more of a system around my writing business this month, which is aimed toward iterating and optimizing what already works, while making small improvements. I also find myself channeling some of that Venusian energy in my interactions with other people, when I let myself open up to the compassionate aspect of it.
9-2-2019 I’ve been missing my dad a lot lately. I’ve been processing a lot of anger about my childhood and other things around him, but I still feel this sense of loss and sadness. And something Kat said really hit me: “He made sure you would be taken care of.” she’s right. Whatever his faults, he made sure I would be taken care of and because of him I’m going to be able to pursue my dreams. And I can’t tell them him that now. I can show it in some ways, but I miss him. I miss talking to him on the phone.
9-5-2019 The last few days have been instructive for me in regards to creativity and love, which I guess is how I’m thinking of this month. In my case and in the case of a co-worker, I’m seeing how we’re both taking steps to pursue what we love, taking risks, and letting nothing stand in our way. Working with Netzach/Venus/Auriel this month I nonetheless also see the value of making calculated choices to get where I’m going. I’m getting ready to pursue a path fully because I’ve weighed the odds and though there is risk, there is also my drive and determination, which will carry me to success.
9-8-2019 It is easy to be part of a community when it is convenient for you, but you discover what a community really is when you need to be part of that community and it isn’t easy or convenient because it means you need to put the needs of someone else before your own. The last couple of days has been just like that because one of my community members has needed people to step up and be there for her and her brother and this need will likely continue for at least the short term future. It oddly enough is appropriate to the work I’m doing this month and it serves to remind me of how important it is to be there for the community I’m part of, when they need me.
9-12-2019 Everything has been a bit fractured lately, because of situations going on that have demanded my attention…yet those very situations also illustrate the lessons of Venus, creativity and Auriel…the need to make hard decisions and sacrifices for what and who you love. If you can’t make those hard choices, then you never get anywhere with what you’re doing. And at the same time, I also feel the spinning of the web, the crystallization of reality…Patterns are being formed and manifested for the rest of this year that will propel everything I do from here, if I can put the right attention to detail into place.
9-14-2019 Auriel reminds me that what makes up success is preparation and execution. The more prepared you are, the easier it is to execute and achieve success.
9-17- 2019 Something I’ve taken to doing is reading more at work, when I’m on my breaks, instead of surfing online. I’ve really been reflecting on what is essential in my relationships, my work etc, and it comes back to making the right choices that truly empower me, instead of getting wrapped up in what other people want or need from me…or the ways I can distract myself from what’s essential.
9-18-2019 Doing any creative work requires a devotion to the work, a willingness to make that work important. I had someone comment today on how I have a side hustle and that it’ll help me get out of the job I’m working at. I suspect it will, but its something I would do regardless. My one regret is that I held off on writing for way too long. I’m much happier doing it now and suspect I would have been all along. But sometimes we don’t the value of something until we come to that point of clarity, where its clear that thing is what should matter most.
9-20-2019 This month was a quixotic month for me. Today I was volunteering at Free Geek, and as I was tearing apart computers, I reflected on how Netzach/Auriel/Venus really helped me recognize what/who is important in my life, even as I also recognize that who I give myself to is something I must do carefully. The gift of me as a friend, lover, or family is only for people who can really truly appreciate that gift and recognize what comes with it. Yet I must also recognize the responsibility of choosing to gift someone my love, friendship etc., because all of that must be balanced with my own creative work and the magic, which is also my love and my drive. I have sometimes given too freely of myself and when that has happened its been a drain. I’ve learned to filter people accordingly, because that is part of what I must do to take care of myself and love myself.
Picture copyright Taylor Ellwood 2019 - Venus